now I remember . . .

Ok, I didn't *just* remember, but I do finally have some time to talk about what I wanted to talk about last time when I kind of got sidetracked and went on and on about nothing. (Ha! That was a mouthful!!)

So, have you seen the latest kiddy movie "UP?" It is so fantastic and not at all just a kiddy movie and -- this is the best part -- there are no *politics* in the whole movie. Really. I'm not kidding. It was fantastic and, if you haven't already, you need to go see it.

Although, I will say that if you don't really care for good wholesome movies that have a moral to the story AND you are not particularly in the mood for having *anything* to do with loving relationships, then I would not recommend this movie. You would probably be better off going to see something with a lot of yelling and guns and blood.

Ok, now that I've got it set up for you, here's what I *really* wanted to talk about: We were sitting in the theartre (RL, my daughter, and I), watching this kid's movie on a Sunday afternoon, and there was a younger couple sitting in front of us. Not *very* young. Probably in their late twenties, early thirties. Within the first FIFTEEN minutes, these two were all over each other. At one point, the guy had his head in her lap and her skirt was pulled up!!

Now, I'm all for some hot steamy lovin, but c'mon! At the kids movie? In the middle of the theatre? At least go sit on the back row. At least pick a movie where there's not going to be kids *everywhere* around you. That's just too perverted!!

in no particular order

Since I can't seem to pin down one thought long enough to shape it into its own post, I'll just share some things that have been on my mind the past few days.

• My daughter (19) has been out of work for about 6 months. It's driving me crazy, because she's just shy of becoming a homeless person. She technically still lives at home, but she's rarely there and seems to have absolutely no ambition to make a living and move out on her own.

• My son (27) hasn't spoken to me and I haven't seen him in about a year and a half. It's paticularly difficult this time of year. There's lots more I feel/could say about this subject, but there's just too much. Maybe I should start an entirely new blog just about that.

• My dog has chronic bronchitis and is going through a change in medication. I think the new medication is making her depressed. It is really sad. She's just a pitiful whiny mess.

• The future of this country scares the shiitake out me.

• Should I be worried that I have no desire to listen to music of any kind these days?

• I don't think sex three times a week is unreasonable.

• My house will be clean before the family comes over for Thanksgiving. My house will be clean before . . . .

• I don't think sex four times a week is unreasonable.

• I hate the class I'm taking this semester. Engineering Computer Programming has ruined more 4.0 GPA.

• What's really an unreasonable number of times to have sex in one week?

stress relief

You want to know a great stress reliever? No, I'm not talking about that! Is that all you people think about? No, I'm talking about blogging. Yes, blogging is a great stress reliever, because it works pretty much like other stress relievers . . . That's right, it relieves stress. But it doesn't have all the nasty side effects.

Think about it. If I wanted to relieve stress by, say, getting drunk, then I would waste a lot of time and money. I would probably start drinking way too much, way too often, and I would probably become an alcoholic and lose my job and family and it goes on and on.

If I relieved stress by doing drugs, then pretty much the same thing would happen as drinking, except that on top of all that, I would become paranoid also. Which really wouldn't relieve any stress at all and I would have to do more drugs to get over being stressed from being paranoid and that would just make me crazy.

I could always go shopping. Well, except that I hate shopping. Ok, I don't hate all shopping all the time. But I don't go shopping for the sheer enjoyment of it very often. And if I did, then I would spend too much money and RL would start griping about how much I spend and we'd start fighting all the time and then end up not talking to each other and never have sex and there's enough of the not having sex going on already, thank you very much.

So see, blogging is a lot better at relieving stress than all those other things. It doesn't cost any money. (Well, except for the internet service.) And it doesn't take up any time from the family. (Well, ok, it does take up some time and maybe some families suffer from it.)

But blogging doesn't come in "one size fits all" and I don't have to stand in line and it's not addictive . . . Ok, but I don't have to stand in line . . . Ok well, after my daughter is done on MySpace.

Ok, well, anyway I'm blogging. OK? And I'm not stressed anymore. Alright?? Dang!!!

Just so you know, RL just sent me a message letting me know that his company is flying me out this weekend for his birthday booty call. I think I'll be much better by this time next week. Thanks for understanding.

whatever it takes

As most of you know, RL is out of town a LOT. So when RS encouraged us to take part in the 30-day challenge you can understand my disappointment that it was 30 consecutive days. And though Girl and I rallied for amending the rules, it was not meant to be. However, this just made me more determined! I am a resourceful woman. Rules or no rules, there's more than one way to skin a cat. (Oooo, I'm so clever!)

So anyway, there have been those rare occasions when RL was willing to reach out and touch love, cause ya know when I need love, I hold out my hand and touch love. But this week -- well, this week RL really out did himself!

Since I got my fancy Palm Treo (which I love, btw) it's great! Because, though I work outside, I can still have my little phone/computer with me and RL and I have been able to keep in touch through instant messages nearly all day. (I know that was a long sentence, but I tend to do that when I get a little excited.) So the other day at lunch, I was in the work truck, doing some homework, and just so happened to have my phone in just the right place when RL sent me a message. {{{BZZZ BZZZ BZZZ}}} I nearly came out of my seat!

Then today I had my phone in the front breast pocket of my coat. Even with the layers upon layers of clothing I had on, when RL sent me an unexpected message {{{BZZZ BZZZ BZZZ}}} I just about fell to my knees. And, of course, each time I let out a little involuntary giggle. But it was just our little secret. Even if he didn't realize what he'd done. DANG! He's good!!

30-day challenge? Pfft! This is the 21st Century -- No problem!!

smut meme

**************T.M.I. WARNING IN EFFECT***************

Therese tagged me to do this. For those of you who know me personally, this may be more than you ever really wanted to know about me. But then, to some it will be no surprise. And for the anonymous bloggers out there, I just want to tell you what a courageous (or stupid) thing this is I'm doing here -- even my pastor reads this blog!

The Rules (You know I'm all about that!): Title your post the "Smut Meme," include the rules, and then select one choice from each of the following questions. When finished, tag two people. Tagged or not, feel free to share in the comments, or post it on your blog.

1) Chocolate or Whipped Cream - Whipped cream is okay. It's fun using the Reddi Whip and squirting it where you want, and I like the taste. But it doesn't last long; it tends to melt and turn into milk which isn't all that sexy. So I choose chocolate.

2) Leather or PVC - Definitely leather. Leather gloves drive me crazy!

3) Out door sex or indoor sex - Outdoor sex is awesome. There's the whole "what if someone sees us" excitement. But having to choose one or the other, I would say indoor sex.

4) Jacuzzi or bed - Definitely the bed. We've done lots of water sports (shower, tub, hot tub, lake), but I prefer the bed.

5) Bad sex or no sex - Someone told me once that any sex is good sex. They were wrong. Bad sex just makes me mad and frustrated. I'd rather have no sex.

6) Dominate or be dominated - I've been told I'm demanding, but I just know what I like. The truth, though, is I like it when my man takes control.

7) Thigh highs or bodystocking - I don't understand why no one likes the bodystocking. Really, I'm serious, I love mine. It's the best thing for those cold nights when coming home from picking up hubby from the airport.

8) Fast or slow - Ok, I'm guessing fast is like a quickie, which is necessary at times. But, again, since I get to choose here I'll go with slow. Taking your time is always best.

9) Rough or gentle - Gentle is good for starters, but if it doesn't get a little rough evenutally I tend to get a little bored.

10) Bite or suck - No biting!

11) Role play or reality - We've only experimented with the role play once, and it was so much fun. But at the end of the day I want the real thing, baby!

12) Dirty talking or dirty talking to - Absolutely dirty talking to.

13) Edible panties or no panties - No panties

14) Spanking paddle or bare hand - Bare hand . . . please

15) Landing strip or Kojak - I prefer to call it the bald eagle. Liberty, pursuit of happiness and all that.

16) Multiple sessions or one good fuck - That is a really difficult choice. So, in a perfect world, I would choose multiple sessions.

17) Moaning or screaming - Always moaning, but an empty nest lends to screaming.

18) Older men or younger men - Older men

19) Three way or no way - No way

20) Swinging or no swinging - No swinging

*************This ends the T.M.I. Warning***************

Unless you continue on to the comments, then you're at your own risk.

And now for the tag: 1blueshi1 and Silent Male

know your boundaries

Last night in class we did an analysis in which we were asked a series of questions about ourselves. We were to check the ones that we knew about ourselves, what we've told a friend/S.O. about us, and the ones that we would be willing to share with the class.

We broke off into small groups, completed the analysis, then past them to those in our group. Each group member had the opportunity to ask about three of the questions that we had said we would share with the class. This was fine, until one of the guys in the group decided to ask the other guy in our group about what his favorite form of erotic play and sexual love-making is. (Yep, that was one of the questions on the paper)! We all laughed, but then the guy proceeds to tell us all about it. Don't ask me what he said, though, because I plugged my hears and did the whole "la la la la la la la" thing. Then, of course, they all laughed even harder.

The purpose of the analysis was to show the importance of boundaries. Of course, the instructor didn't tell us that until after the fact, but I don't think it would have made any difference to these guys.

g-rated?

In my blogger travels, I've noticed some have this cool little rating banner. And being the curious kind, I clicked that how-does-your-blog-rate link below the banner. To my surprise . . . dismay . . . (I'm not sure what word would be correct) my blog received a G rating. Surely, I thought, I deserved at least a PG, but G? That's crazy. This isn't a trashy site, but definitely not all of the content is open for all ages.

Then I noticed it was because the word sex was only found once on my entire blog. Well, that is a completely ridiculous way to rate a blog, because everyone knows context rules. I mean, just because a post is about going to the convenience store or traveling from state to state, doesn't mean it's not about sex. Heck, I was just reading this morning about how Diet Mt. Dew can be about sex. Even a scavenger hunt can be about sex. But you wouldn't know that out of context.

So all I'm saying is there is a lot I've written about that I wouldn't necessarily want children to read (not that any have been here, but you never know) and so I thought it would be nice to give a little warning.

Let's see if I've added just enough sex talk to get the rating I want . . .

That's better!

52 naughty nights

Sometime around the first of the year . . . Well, actually, come to think of it, it was back around Valentine's Day, RL and I were wanting to spice things up a bit. Not that things were boring (how could it be boring?), but just to add a little something to the soup, so to speak. We decided to go to . . . um . . . the convenience store (yeah, that's what I'm calling it) and see if we could find something fun, inexpensive, and that we both would enjoy.

First, let me just say, going to the store together was itself a little adventure (for me anyway). It made me feel like an innocent teen again. I mean, oh my gosh! There was just so much to choose from. So many spices! It was kind of difficult to make a choice. And I guess it was obvious, because after several minutes of walking around the store pointing and snickering to ourselves, the nice young lady behind the counter came over to ask if she could offer some assistance.

Now, I'm all about customer service. Good customer service. I would give this young lady an A+ in customer service. You cannot believe how knowledgeable she was about the products, their quality, and . . . um . . . performance. I mean, she even explained how beneficial these products had been for her. Can you imagine: "Now this [item] is really nice for when you want . . . And, oh, I love this [item] . . . My boyfriend really likes these [items] . . . We also have some silicone [oils] just for her. They're waterproof and great in the shower." She knew just about everything there was to know about everything in the store.

Anyway, after looking around we found some games. Well, this looked interesting (and inexpensive), so after looking over a few we decided to get a set of cards: 52 cards for her and 52 cards for him in a set. The description boasts fun for each week of the year. The idea is for each person to (there's a two player limit :o) draw a card each week and, sometime during that week, follow the instructions on the back of the card. The instructions? Well, it could be something that she might do right away for him or it might be something he might have to wait to do to surprise her.

It is now week 50 of the year 2007 and we have drawn about 4 cards each. Really! It's difficult to play this game when RL is out of town so much. And I think the instructions are a little more difficult for him to follow than they are for me. Not that he doesn't understand them, but that they just involve a little more effort and, sometimes, preparation. But, oh, it has been fun playing, planning, and anticipating!

here in the states

I like traveling. I like the planning, the packing, the mapping. All of it. And the best thing about it is sharing the experience with others. The pictures . . . Ok, sorry I don't actually have any pictures of my recent travels. Buying souvenirs for family and friends. Oh well sorry, no actual souvenirs either. So you, lucky people, get to read about the states I've visited lately.

Every once in a while, on my many journeys, I drive through the lovely and always fascinating state of Confusion. Ok, really it's more like I accidently end up there. I'll be on my way to Happiness or Contentment and somehow I'll take a wrong turn and end up in Confusion. And I hate it there! No one knows their way around and you can't get directions. By the time you finally figure out how to get out of Confusion you wind up smack in the middle of downtown Frustration!

Near the middle of each month I take a little trip through the State of Depression. It's usually a short trip, but its a long drive getting back home. I've been there so many times the past few years it's fairly easy for me to find my way around. Some people live there, but they're kind of hard to talk to.

Sometimes I take unplanned trips to Depression. I mean, it's like one day I'm home and then I wake up and I'm in Depression. I think, "How did I get here?" And I sit and wonder and think and think how the heck I got there. But I can't ever figure it out and so before I get home from Depression I have to take the long drive through Confusion.

The other day I took a fun little trip through Pleasure. My husband was able to go with me this time. Usually he's working out of town and we wait to go on the weekend or sometimes I have to go to Pleasure by myself. But anyway, the other day we took a five day tour through Pleasure. It was great! What I like most about going there is there's always something to do. Every second is filled with all kinds of adventure. And even if you're not feeling very adventurous, there's lots of opportunities to just sit back and relax. During part of the trip it got kind of hot, but we didn't mind. It was a little sad, though, when the trip was over. But I'm already planning our next trip back.

So where have you been lately?

real sex

The latest book I've been reading is Real Sex: The Naked Truth About Chastity, by Lauren F. Winner. The first few chapters are foundational and a little difficult to get through, but well worth it. The main thing this book relates, I think, is that 1) sex has become so common place in society (tv, movies, magazines, talk shows) that there's really no sacredness to it; 2) Sex is thought of as none of anyone else's business but the individuals; and 3) Sex is really about community and our accountability to each other, single or married. It's not enough to tell teenagers or twenty-somethings that they're worth the wait until they get married to have sex. It's about being chaste before and after they are married.

This is one of those books that I'll have to read again to really study it. Something inside me wants to use it to structure a Bible study for young adults, though I haven't taught in about 5 years (a subject for another blog). But the other part of me thinks, "How can you teach a Bible study on something that you've struggled with all of your life?" Hmmmmm. Maybe that's what makes me such an expert on the subject.